Creating a safe space sounds easy and straightforward: all people feel immediately welcome, truly respected and genuinely valued. Some say we can only create “Safer Spaces”, which are safer than society in general, but still not safe for everyone. My experience paints exactly the same picture: There are no safe spaces! Some of us have to be prepared to be attacked at all times for traits we cannot influence - even when surrounding with other oppressed people. Let’s talk about civilisation - that mysterious conglomerate of conventions, role models, habits, stereotypes and fairy-tales - that forges our identities. Let’s talk about biases we all are carrying around. Let’s talk about how to make spaces - as our offices, conferences, meetups or family meetings - as safe as possible.